Worst Travel Turkeys of 2013

Next time you take a nap on a flight, take a minute and wonder if your pilot is doing the same thing. A safety report from earlier this year detailed an incident in which a plane was left unmanned. One of the two pilots left the cockpit to use the bathroom, and upon return, he could not rouse the second pilot to open the cockpit door, which was locked. The pilot and crew had to open the door from the outside—and they entered to find the first officer slumbering at the controls. A spokesperson for the Dutch Safety Board (which released the report), called the incident "serious" and stated that "the flight was in danger."

Most major airlines increased their fees this year—a lot. Delta added a $450 change fee for certain tickets, Southwest started charging $12.50 for EarlyBird check-in, and Alaska raised its first-checked-bag fee to $25, among other examples.

This was not a great year for the TSA. The agency even failed its own security test: An agent with a fake bomb made it through a magnetometer screening and a secondary patdown without getting caught. The TSA's response? "It's not like they're using a cartoonish bundle of dynamite with an alarm clock strapped to it. These items are extremely hard to spot." Comforting, no?

A 61-year-old flyer wins our award for worst passenger of the year. Joe Rickey Hundley, a former executive (we say "former" because he was fired from his job as president of Unitech Composites and Structures after the incident) pleaded guilty in 2013 to slapping a crying toddler on a plane. According to FBI agents, Hundley slapped the one-year-old in the face and told the boy's mother to "shut that [racial slur] baby up." Stay classy, air travelers!

We can definitely trust the people in charge of our nation's air travel security to handle a non-deadly weapon like pepper spray, right? Oh, wait, it's the TSA, so, no, we can't. TSA agent Chris Yves Dabel proved that this year when he played with a canister of pepper spray he found on the floor and ended up discharging it, sending five TSA agents to the hospital.

The most insensitive flight attendant award goes to the crew member who tried to make a flyer put her small dog in the overhead compartment during a flight. "We put dogs up there all the time," she said. "They're fine. They can breathe."

Thought our first report of a pilot falling asleep mid-flight was just a freak incident? Unfortunately, it wasn't. In a separate event this year, both pilots on another flight fell asleep mid-flight, leaving the cockpit completely unattended. Even worse, the pilots turned themselves in, in the hopes of drawing attention to the incident, which apparently happens frighteningly often due to pilot fatigue.

Guests at the Cecil Hotel in Los Angeles complained about low water pressure, a funny taste, and black water in the shower—only to find out that the water they had been drinking and bathing in was coming from a tank in which a dead body was floating. A 21-year-old woman staying at the hotel died in one of its rooftop water tanks, and her corpse went undiscovered for more than two weeks. The victim's parents are now suing the hotel's management company for wrongful death, and we wouldn't be surprised if the hotel had to make payouts to traumatized guests who drank the water as well.

The worst smuggler of 2013 has to be the woman who tried to smuggle tadpoles out of China—in her mouth. The flyer's first mistake was trying to bring the tadpoles through security in a water bottle, which violated the liquid rule. When told to throw the bottle out, the woman chugged the liquid (and the tadpoles) but didn't swallow. Needless to say, she was busted.

The most impatient flyer of 2013 is probably Donald Gee, who punched a pilot in the head after his flight was delayed. Before you head out on your holiday travels, watch this video of the altercation and remember that bad behavior definitely won't get you in the air any faster.

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